If you follow me on Twitter you know I do a lot of “file” upgrades and downgrades in regards to my lady friends.  People assume I am joking, but they would be assuming incorrectly I keep files on every woman I come in contact with on or offline. It is my mental file cabinet.

What I want to do, is give you a glimpse at how one of these files look.  This is the first time a file has been shared with the public or even been written in print, so consider this an exclusive.

RL Draft Board Rank: #3

Location: DMV

Age: 24

She is a “Black Cat” according to the feline chart.   More mature than most young ladies her age, but still has some young girl tendencies, possible red flag just be aware.

Physical appearance:

Definitely Dark Chocolate a prefer flavor of the 31 one to choose from.  About 5’4” absolutely gorgeous smile.  Booty average, but puppies are at an A+ level.  Possible “lacefrontalert”, but claims it is all of her hair, will be sure to try to confirm if “breaklamps” session takes place.  Pretty hair though even if it is a lacefrontalert.  It is long and long hair is always preferred.  Doesn’t like to show the legs, “skinnylegalert”, but willing to overlook because of the puppies.

Very stylish.  She knows how to dress.  Classy stuff.  Doesn’t show any #myspacemodel tendencies in any of her pics.  Not tats that I can see meaning we can add to the explore section of the possible #breaklamp session.

Stands out in a crowd definitely a strong 8 would be considered an “upgrade” for me.  Very good arm candy candidate.

Personality:

Very intelligent.  Very blunt doesn’t bite her tongue.  Can be a little long winded, but she is a girl what do you expect.  Not sensitive, almost has the mindset of a guy which is always a huge red flag because she can anticipate what I am thinking and I hate being outwitted. I lose the advantage like that.

Has a bit of a short fuse it has gotten better since we first met.  Really nice though always helping people and always willing to give a helping hand.  Very good heart.

Intangibles:

She got some money which is always a good thing.  Own house, own car and own business.  Possible “sugarmommasalert”?  Naw too young and I don’t have the time.  Pool at the condo that is definitely a plus.  She a hustler and has a scratch my back, I will scratch your back mentality. She fits the “new” profile I have been looking for in the women I deal with, since I retired from “nohism”.

Doesn’t wear Flip-Flops, doesn’t have a problem with PF Changs, all upgrades in her file.  She seems to “get me” which I lot of women don’t.

Doesn’t party a lot, but seems to have a good time when she goes out.  She drinks, but nothing crazy not an “alcoholicalert”.  Doesn’t smoke which is good.  Makes it known she needs to be center of attention, but since at most this will be a “drive by lamp breaking” I can give her the attention she wants for that short period of time.

In some regards a little uppity, but on the flipside very down to earth interesting dynamic.  Split personality syndrome.  Not a severe case, but you need to remember to stay on more of the “Ohio State Level Rob” as oppose to the “Old School NorthSide STL Rob”.

She is a sports fan.  Big Wizards fan goes to a lot of games, not as much NFL, but at least has some passion for sports which puts her in the preferred status.  Not a groupie, not a noho and even her noho tendencies are very low which is unusual for her age, but I gather since she has been around money “fake flossing” doesn’t impress her.

Lamp Break Potential:

It has been in a current state of flux since we first met.  The % seem high in the early stages, but then after some conversation dipped to 0%, but recently chances have increased to a 50/50 level .  Doesn’t have a boyfriend per se, does have a #1 option for Lamp Breaking and a Manu Ginobili guy that comes off the bench.

From conversions I don’t think there is a very high chance of being “mcnaired”. Her personality is such she should be able to emotionally detach from the lamp breaking, but must keep reminding myself she is in “Black Cat” status so you never know how they will react.

She made interesting comment that her “mind wanders” during lamp breaking sessions on things like going to the grocery store.  Once again will chalk that up to “Black Cat” status if “Breaking lamps” do occur make sure to look for any signs of mind wandering and if you see them go into “RL MODE”.

Freak status still undetermined.  For a time thought it was at high level after more conversions not to sure.  If “contract” is signed for lamp breaking then will dig for more information until then no need to waste time talking about something that might happened.  Would like a lap dance though if possible.

Contract talks are ongoing file will be updated once more definite information is known.

Conclusion:

Definitely a hottie who I would like to Break Lamps with. Age difference and distance would eliminate any possible long term relationship. Even if no Lamp Breaking takes place she is definitely someone I would continue to be friends with.  The age thing is a bit of a concern.  My friend Cougarlicious keeps telling me I shouldn’t talk to anyone 27 or under, but I am a bit hard headed in that regard.

Definitely need to see her in some form of dress to confirm or deny the “skinnylegsalert”

A little iffy on how well the Lamp Breaking would go especially if she is thinking about “Unicorns” and stuff while I am running out of breath, but I am will take my chances I am a “vet” I know how to “knock out” those unicorns thoughts.

Maybe start discussions on how she likes to break lamps just casually don’t want to spend too much time on an boxing opponent if she turns out to be a Kelly Pavlik chick.

Have to be aware of the status of her #1 option because if that becomes permanent don’t want to be in a “mcnaired” situation.

At this point she keeps her #3 ranking on the draft board will review the file and make upgrades and downgrades throughout the week.

*Filed Closed*